My past predictions have been so stunningly prescient that I thought I’d try a week-to-week schedule. (Note: if you read this blog regularly, you know I sometimes confuse a week with half a year; bear with me).

• After Facebook and YouTube go for $1b+, Congress proposes the Feed-Lonelygirl Act of 2006, dictating the in-house production and sale of 20 teen video sites per week to finance the Iraqi war. Ex-Senator Mark Foley will spearhead the effort, promising “pages so interactive, so alluring, so tantaliz…what was the question?”
• The resolution passes quickly amid new concerns that Iraq is conspiring with remaining Axis of Evil members North Korea and PayPerPost.
• HP is granted a temporary reprieve as a leak scandal at Google takes center stage. The Google Missing Bicycle Finder team is fired after details about its forthcoming product leak days before release, violating a sacred company rule: Management shall not know about any internal product until after it is released.
• Lost will air another episode filled with shocking twists, bewildering mysteries, and absolutely no hint of a final payoff. The show is filmed on location at every startup in Silicon Valley.